• 2009-12-16

    Announcement - [杂烩]

    Tag:英文

    From today, I decide to write blog in both English and Chinese, no matter how awful my grammer is.

    I highly doubt that I cannot express ideas and feelings exactly in English, but still, I will stick on this announcement.

    P.S. I fogot the word "announcement" actually!!

  • 2010-01-01

    十年前后 - [文字]

          十年前,我坐在电视机前看到很多人在狂欢迎接新世纪的到来,自己也莫名地激动,觉得在课堂上说了那么久的21世纪终于到了;十年后,我走在街上,买了份南方周末,边看新年献词边感慨世界变化快。

          十年前,我刚上初中不久,还在惋惜自己没有时间看中央六台的动画片,刚刚开始看漫画,还在纠结数学成绩不好以及焦虑考不上高中;十年后我大学要毕业,远远地离开了数学,很久没有看漫画,还没找到工作,还心存很多梦想,但内心却总是茫然。

          十年前,我还没有接触网络,离买第一台电脑还有一年的时间,电视机是最大的娱乐,《还珠格格》还余韵悠长,在日记里写下,“今年是21世纪的第一天,我相信世界会更美好”;十年后,家中的电脑升级换代了好几台,自己也有了两台电脑,电视早已淡出我的视野,我再也离不开网络,坐在电脑前的时间比睡觉的时间都多。

         十年前,我相信很多事情,相信自己是一个大侠,相信梁实秋是坏蛋,相信生活只是一出永远定格在当下的电视剧;十年后,我相信很少的事情,相信自己只是个小人物,相信世界上没有绝对的好坏,相信电视剧也会有剧终的一天,而生活的剧情出乎意料。

         十年,我改变了很多。现在有点迷惑,十年时间,有没有什么没有改变的?

         一直在记日记,即使现在有了博客的情况下;一直在看书,从没谱的书到有谱的书;一直喜爱动漫,列的“一生要做的50件事”的清单中,一直有“把《神雕侠侣》拍成动画片”一项;一直没有男朋友,不允许有和可以有的时候都没有;一直坚持一点东西,但是自己现在也说不清楚是什么。

          新的一年来临了,我抄下了南方周末新年献词中的一段:“这是你所拥有的时间,是你生命中无可逃避的一段历程。假如你愿意的话,你可以用它来做很多事情,你可以找到你想要的生活。”

  • 2009-12-31

    年末 - [杂烩]

    Tag:文字 总结

          2009年最后一天的第一个小时,我坐在电脑前拼命想编辑好wordpress平台下的草稿;第二个小时,我坐在宿舍,听着其他人的呼吸声,看着渐渐入睡的网络,觉得自己终于在清醒的状态里内心平静,面对新的一年。

    2009年,我

          2009年,做了很多我及其看重非常珍视的事:考研行动失败,我坚决拒绝了再来一次的打算;加入读书会,是今年最珍视一件事;曾经的同班同学相继离开,我还留在原地踏步;夏天一个人在宿舍呆了将近两个月,单纯地看书看片,在洋浦不真实的生活一去不复返;找了三个月的工作,最终改做其他打算;在最后一个月,我终于认清了自己的轮廓;在最后一个月,终于在网络中做一些认为有意义的事情。

    2009年,朋友

         HUI很坚定以及执着地继续北大征程,同时也在畅想调剂回云大的美好生活;小南子定于2011年11月11日领证结婚,并且准备在上海呆下去;June的电影梦想有声有色进行,在年末登上了春城晚报的其中一版;小曾子2009年过完即将远赴深圳……我祝福他们。

    2009年,网络

          2009年春天,我看美剧正渐入佳境;夏天,在VC上疯狂下了很多雅思有关的资料;秋天,用RaySource下了很多英剧;冬天,BTChina关了,YDY等电视剧网站转型了,我转投盗版碟市了。

          2009年秋冬,我喜爱的一个又一个独立博客倒下;我喜爱的网站一个又一个关闭;GR里“逝者已矣”文件夹又多了很多新成员;点击的的网址空白一片的频率也越来越高;为了翻过那堵墙,努力学习新技术;为了接受新信息,努力学习外语。

    2009年,未来

         看到2009年第一天写下的《新年新愿望》,发现完成了一些,有些还是放弃了。转眼间,2009年整年又要过去了。每到年末,总有点依依不舍。但是生活仍然要继续,脚步虽然踉跄,但仍坚定执着。

  • 2009-12-27

    青灯 - [读书]

    Tag:读书 转载

    青灯

    北岛

     

    故国残月

    沉入深潭中

    重如那些石头

    你把词语垒进历史

    让河道转弯

     

    花开几度

    催动朝代盛衰

    乌鸦即鼓声

    帝王们如蚕吐丝

    为你织成长卷

     

    美女如云

    护送内心航程

    青灯掀开梦遗教

    你顺手挽住火焰

    化作满天大雪

     

    把酒临风

    你和中国一起老去

    长廊贯穿春秋

    大门口的陌生人

    正砸响那门环

    ---------------------------------------------

           并不是我不爱读现代诗,只是我能读懂的现代诗实在太少。北岛在《青灯》里的这首诗,感觉很好。

  • China in 2009 was the land we all hoped it would be: the enemy, the friend, the brilliant tactician, the bumbling oaf. China is such a mix of strength and weakness these days that it provides endless material for opportunistic arguments. Here are the top ten myths about China in 2009 and how they fared:

    China’s carmakers will never range far beyond their borders. Fact: It was only six years ago that a prestigious report by the U.S. National Academies and the Chinese Academy of Engineering dismissed China’s engineering and vehicle-development capabilities, according to Dan Sperling, one of the authors. Well, in a moment oozing with symbolism, the Sichuan Tengzhong Heavy Industrial Machinery, an obscure heavy-machinery maker, unveiled a deal in October to buy GM’s Hummer. Around the same time, Geely Automobile Holdings Ltd, which got $334 million from Goldman Sachs in September, was named by Ford as the preferred bidder for Volvo. Geely is rumored to be offering $2 billion for Volvo, far less than the $6.5 billion that Ford paid for the brand in 1999. China, it turns out, may be a major automaker (or automaker owner) after all.

    China sprinted through the global slowdown unharmed. Fact: Not quite. China’s economy continued to grow at a rate of eight per cent in 2009, but that does not mean that the economy is tuned to peak efficiency. The credit goes to a $586 billion stimulus package that was far larger than many people initially realized. Considering the size of its economy, the spending was nearly double that of the U.S. stimulus. With Chinese banks ordered to lend, and government agencies ordered to buy and invest, the health of the broader economy was far harder to measure.

    President Obama’s visit was a disappointment. Fact: When Obama made his first visit to China, in November, he avoided fireworks and downplayed overt talk about human rights. The initial coverage from the White House press corps was cool, with many pieces asking some version of whether the Chinese “squelched” discussion of tough topics. But in the days that followed, some China-watchers reached a different consensus: Beijing coughed up its first targets for greenhouse-gas emissions controls; it agreed to join a U.S.-backed statement criticizing Iran for flouting U.N. resolutions, the first such declaration since 2006 to be backed by both China and Russia; and it indicated that it may widen its flexibility on reforming the exchange rate. Jim Fallows at the Atlantic has a good compilation of what has come out of the visit.

    Chinese Web users have no impact on the government. Fact: In June, China unveiled plans to require all new personal computers to come with filtering software “Green Dam Youth Escort,” but an outcry from Chinese Web users and foreign technology companies forced the government to rethink. It would have been too embarrassing to abandon it completely, but the government postponed indefinitely the mandatory pre-installation of the software on new computers. Some Asian brands, including Acer and Lenovo, agreed to put it in package anyway. Eventually the government announced that schools, Internet cafés and other public-use computers would still be required to run the software.

    The Internet might be censored but it can never be rolled back in China. Fact: Over the summer, China embarked on an unprecedented effort to maintain stability: it could be called The Great Internet Shut-Down. After scores of people were killed and hundreds injured in the worst ethnic violence in decades in the Xinjiang region, authorities simply turned off large portions of the Web in Xinjiang and left it off for months. No email, Skype, and IM, though local news sites and shopping and such were still available, as this good description points out. The effect on business and education is incalculable, but, in a measure of how much China is willing to do to protect stability, authorities kept the ban in place well into the winter. This would probably not work on a national basis, but the ban was a shocking reminder of what is possible.

    China’s weak judicial independence is a problem for Chinese citizens but not for business. Fact: In July, 2009, authorities detained four employees of the Australian miner Rio Tinto, accusing them of stealing state secrets during acrimonious iron-ore price negotiations. They included Stern Hu, an Australian citizen and Rio Tinto’s top iron ore salesman in China. They were later formally arrested for stealing commercial secrets, and the investigation was recently extended into mid-January.

    As China opens up, it permits dissidents to advocate because they have only a tiny following. Fact: One the curious things about the Chinese government in 2009 is how often it acted like an elephant afraid of a mouse. For all of its strength and sophistication in economic and diplomatic matters, it continued to rely on primitive political tactics to round up the perceived opposition. Liu Xiaobo, the co-author of Charter 08, a petition for reform, was detained in December, 2008, and formally arrested in June on suspicion of inciting the subversion of state power. An international outcry followed, but he remained in jail. Approaching the anniversary of his detention, his wife Liu Xia told the Guardian that it was “very possible” he could be sentenced to more than ten years. “My biggest hope is that the public can still pay attention to his case and Xiaobo can come back home soon.”

    China is a land of no siblings. Fact: In July, the Shanghai government began encouraging eligible parents to have a second child in effort to counter the effects of an aging population. This is a major sign of a more relaxed attitude about the one-child policy in place since the seventies. In fact, two-child families are all over China, as parents earn enough money to pay fines or find loopholes in the policy, which is more porous than most outsiders imagine. Parents who were both only children are allowed a second child. Rural parents are also allowed to have a second child, if the first-born is a girl.

    China’s work on climate change is more rhetoric than substance. Fact: China has concluded unmistakably that climate change is a security and stability threat, and it is treating it as such. In 2006, the same year that James Hansen, NASA’s top climate scientist, was accusing the Bush Administration of trying to muzzle his call for emission cuts, China released its first report on climate change, which predicted serious changes to its landscape—and, most importantly, its food supply. The report predicted that the output of major crops such as wheat, rice, and corn would fall by up to thirty-seven per cent in the second half of the century if no effective measures were taken in the next twenty to fifty years to address climate-change impacts, according to Xinhua. It embarked on major policy initiatives to prevent that.

    China has already beaten the U.S. on the technology to combat climate change. Fact: China is making unmistakable strides on energy technology, but that campaign has vulnerabilities and the game is far from over. I’ll have more to say about this soon.

  • 2009-12-25

    09.12.25 - [文字]

    Tag:新闻 英文

    I total realized what I  did is useful.

    It just like I was in the sence and the edited news is published on a website.

    I realized that I am not alone that promoting my few efforts to make something change, at least, make it different.

    Althougth something worse may happened in future, I do not have reason to pessimism. Because everyday is changing.

  • 2009-12-21

    有关…… - [杂烩]

    Tag:扯淡 文字

          我有点不知所措。有时候选择太多反而不知道如何选择。同HUI在图书馆天台聊了半天,觉得正因为现在一切未定,才充满了更多的可能性,才更加有趣。这次谈天又让我充满了信心。

         读书会上谈到刘小枫和甘样做的这件回归古典的事情,我才意识到有如此深远的考虑。通过回归古典来改变人的心智,反观现实时就有了建立公民社会的可能性。学术对社会应该是有用的,如果学术闭门造车做纯学术而没有现实关怀,那么在各种运动中特别是知识分子遭受的苦难,老师用了一个词“活该”。

         为了学术理想持续奋斗到现在,似乎有点恍惚。生活像过山车的轨道一成不变,但是却不知道之后是前往迦南地还是回到原来。考研这件事像惯性,价值理性只剩下一点,人确只像个工具一样为了这件事奔波。畅想考研后的幸福生活并不是以考上研为基础。

         学术圈是一个很奇怪的东西,记得毕业论文答辩的时候我向答辩老师解释自己理解的学术圈,结果他们一脸茫然,搞得我很颓丧。HUI说在看论文的时候,奇怪为什么那些人写文章不能好好写,不能写人话,不能写得让人看懂。学术化的表达一般大众看不懂,于是就成了阳春白雪无人问津,可能这样才有了科普。我也觉得学术论文不应该是“把尸骨从一个坟堆里移到另一个坟堆里”,也不应该是像狗撒尿似的划个一小片势力范围。学术可以为有理有据地维权提供保障,同样也可以提高一个组织的公信力。只可惜,现在的学术离人群太远。

          现在的一些事情关系到本科时候的专业课成绩。我说,我并不后悔当时没有好好背书好好考试考出一个好成绩,那些课不值得我花心力去背,只是现在没有好成绩太过麻烦。HUI说,大部分专业课垃圾到考出好成绩没有意义,证明不了什么。可以全面发展但最终证明是全面平庸,一定是哪里出问题了,但是是哪里出问题了呢?我想不出来。

  • 2009-12-14

    09.12.14 - [文字]

    Tag:生活

        我不知如何自处了,我恍惚了,迷惑了。

  •     找工作,百感交集。
        连着几次都被鄙视,特别是昨天被一家特别特别不靠谱的小网站鄙视,感觉内心已经脆弱到被一根稻草压倒。几乎要承受不住的感觉
        纠结于要不要给家里打电话,告诉他们我坚持不下去了,就这样安排我的人生吧。可是仍然不甘心就这样灰溜溜地回去。可能有时候有了后路就容易让人退缩。
        看到香港和英国的大学申请已经开始了,每天接收的信息都展现这样一个让人感觉虚无绝望的国度,真是想逃离。可是又不想走,内心再次纠结。